something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
