My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He felt like a one man threesome
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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