okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
