I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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