did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
