His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize