i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
