sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
