There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
