so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
