Sry I called you an 8
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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