U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
