I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
