I heard we made out
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
