And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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