Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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