real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Screwed.edu
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
