Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
