Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
