Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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