Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize