btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I could have mohawked her pubes.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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