i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
