You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
