Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
