No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
May the power of my ass compel you!!
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize