he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
