the new term for farting is butt boxing.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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