let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
