the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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