I'm really into asian looking animals
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
