ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I have feelings that need drinking.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
