so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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