AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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