I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
