So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Randomize
