K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I just blew my weed a kiss
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
