If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
