This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
