i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
No subtext here. People are naked.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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