we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
