me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
