your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
