Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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