Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
