Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
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