why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
