Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
