I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
