Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
