fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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