i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
