at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
